Phosphorescence between us

Even inside, the ocean was all around you
Coming off your skin in waves, feeling phosphorescence between us
Breezes and sand between the words
I imagined you more heroic
None of my lust came spilling out
w/just a word I sucked it all in and swallowed
my disappointment like a bitter pill
corked it like a forgotten wine and threw it in the blind cellar

All the years of waiting for first moments
Living pure for such a moment to defile
Choose in advance to lay it all down
Visualize best how I’d like you to instigate tempt
But my hero never came
Lost in another story
No one got the glory
Turn to God again in the end
Find gratitude in tears, tears in the beginning
Rather than the end

You hold the power
With one word you could unleash torrents
You could tear down city walls and resurrect the dead
Your intuition is telling you
Follow where you’re led
Open your mouth and prophecy

Just a small token

Wait for your knock on my door
though you don’t know where to go
send a swift messenger around bed time
let me know I’m in your head
I don’t need a full on declaration, for now
just a small token of hunger

Let me teach you beauty
not w/your eyes, but in your hands, a stirring belly
the quiet voice in your heart that whispers my name, creation
feel more masculine in my woman

Waiting to receive your messengers
wondering where you are
wonder how'd love me imperfectly
the father of my child loved me fully bodily
in his eyes my flawed flesh was divine
I sense your difference
growing fascination to leave all others behind
redefine cosmic allegiances
inner landscapes of mortality

I swear your hesitation is taken as rejection
I have knights, I have Adonis, hot blooded Mediterranean Volcanic fire
waiting in line and its not modesty or honor
that restrains me
its hope in our mutual exclusivity

Happy birthday Mr Ghost

Happy birthday Mr Ghost
You were the best of lovers
Grace under the covers
But not much of a gentleman on your toes

Tonight you will dine not in style
Drown your conscious for a while
Use your wit and wiles on painted smiles
Smother the memory of six years ago
What was done at the foot of the mountain
Unleashing the gurgling fountain of Life
Then leave me like a lonely river fountain
Not much of anything, but hidden
Brackish broken brooke, shallow stream
Connected ever so slightly
To the ocean of everything

Mothering patches of moss and fern on the banks
Silent wood creatures quench their thirst w/thanks
Untouched by humans yet undiscovered
Lonely little river content w/ flowing.

The ghost still hovers like a dark cloud
Dead yet somehow cognizant
Interacting, finding near meaning in haunting others
Poor miser among the shadows I toast your health
Your cloud rained upon me once

Roaving Hunger

Hungry for travel
You speak to me like a confidential
Preplanned itinerary
I’ll tell you step by step destinations, carefully researched
Wet your wandering appetite
We’ve already left, but not together yet
Meet me in fairer weather
I’m free as a bird, freer than you
I travel light
Your packages are many, your baggage heavy
I’ll pay your exceeding weight limit this time
But post them home at the rendez-vous
The open road is waiting
And we are both still young
Our friends receive postcards of the images we call aspiration

Don’t feel guilty

Don’t feel guilty lying here satisfied
Belly breathing head spinning intensified
This moment you question its worth
Write it off tax free
As a public service, to me
To the Universe

As if she needs it
Surrounded by wine and sweets and berries
Art entertainment, children and oceans

Regret it and it’s lost
You’ve put off marriage long enough
To meet the Other
Not the one your with, but me
The mother of your providence
Choose momentary hazard
for a life of love sanctuary

The stillness of a January night

I miss the stillness of a January night
Fresh fallen snow
All clean in the moonlight
Time has stopped
Windows are frozen in twilight

Recall the drive home f/your house
See the empty road so lonely, neighbor asleep in warmth
See the void road in the small crack in my window
Body still warm from recent activity

We talked like youth wishing
To wake with each other
Make a life
And I waited for you to grow up
I grew up w/o you
Grew out of alpine winter clothes
Into foreign maturity
Learning how to mother in exotic country
Now our daughter speaks in Tang dynasty poetry
Her own father a mystery
And I’ve no words to explain
Half of her story
Like palace straw stacked to the ceiling
waiting to be gold spun

The prelude has outlasted the wine

The prelude has outlasted the wine
Its still taking too much time
I smell something burning in the background
Neighbors’ ancestor worship in how they talk together
Your nonsense of not sensing

I’ve loved your image, your eternal boy in a man’s body
I’ve loved your personal discretions
Of lost first marriage
Your insecurity to remarry current party

I’ve forgiven slips and slights of my imperfections
Of how I am not your mirror image
Nor do I strive to be—perfect
Better than a mirror I am me

We are in some ways sharing like personality
Adventurer yogi, Cold War prodigy
Political hegemony
Me the world
You locally

“tho I look up to you , you’ll bow down to me someday
Or my likeness internally
Embrace me sooner than later
For your entirety